A story almost every fan of tabletop gaming knows: You want to play a game but are unable to, because you can’t even find people to play with.
It’s not just you - it’s a rite of passage of sorts for D&D players all over the world. One no one wants to go through, one no one cherishes, yet one most seasoned players have experienced at least once. Usually more times.
Because the truth is, finding a group for D&D can be… difficult, at best. And, for some people, impossible at worst. One of the most creative and undeniably extensive hobbies in history thus finds itself gated by its very basic requirement of finding several people to play with. And it shouldn’t be this way.
For some, it might seem natural that it is difficult to find a group to play D&D with - after all, it’s a small hobby with few followers, right?
… Right?
To be fair, so is skiing. Fewer people ski than play D&D, yet as long as you live in a snowy mountain (which I, hailing from a tropical country, never have) it’s relatively easy to find people for it. Yet D&D remains hard to crack for many people.
There actually are places people can go to try and find D&D groups. They’re called hobby stores. They often host events, have tables for people to play, sell D&D books and merchandise and…
Right, let’s be honest here. They’re not known for being the most friendly or inclusive of places. Times are changing and these days they strive to be more welcoming than in previous decades, but the truth still is that many of these shops are still less-than-welcoming to newcomers, particularly minority customers. And no matter how much one might want to find a group for D&D, a group that’s likely to disrespect you or mock you for being who you are isn’t an experience anyone wants.
In fact, the attitudes some of these groups have, sadly, turned quite a few people away from D&D and tabletop games in general. The sad truth is that many hobby shops and tabletop groups aren’t likely to allow those who don’t fit their very same mold to join them. In some cases, they display open hostility towards those who don’t fit the white-straight-male demographic.
There are other options, of course. You might be able to recruit friends or acquaintances to form a D&D group with. Some of them might even already be into the hobby, thus helping you learn to play. It’s a great thing to do, and one most of us dungeon masters have done before: Having our friends group be our D&D group.
And it can work.
Can.
But might not.
Because often, once you’ve finally recruited a wizard, cleric, barbarian, fighter, warlock—and of course, a dwarf (class optional, but clearly mandatory)—that’s when the real challenge begins.
SCHEDULING
Yes. That’s the task. That’s the monster. That’s the one thing that kills more D&D groups than anything else. That’s the main reason keeping people outside of the hobby: Not only can it be difficult to find enough people who want to play, but also people who can play in the same time slot as you. So what starts as a nice hobby to do together can fall apart within weeks or a couple months as different realities and priorities start clashing with a set day and time to play every week.
Worst part? It’s not difficult to understand. It can be hard for people to give the same activity the same importance, and to put it above other activities that might be time-sensitive, or they might do with their families, or that they might simply enjoy more.
But then that sends us back to square one: How do I find a group for D&D? Why is it so difficult to explore dungeons and kill dragons with some people? Is there a way around this?
Turns out there is. It’s called the internet.
Finding D&D Groups on the Internet: A Solution?
It’s not an exaggeration to say the internet has allowed for geek communities to thrive. People who felt alone in their tastes and hobbies in the early 2000s quickly found they could band together and find more people like them - others who enjoyed and wanted things that, in many cases, were considered niche or even weird where they were from.
So it’s no surprise there are dozens, if not hundreds, of online communities dedicated to roleplaying games, D&D among them. There are also websites and software created specifically to make online play of these games simpler. Every day, thousands of people all over the world engage in their favorite hobby online, bypassing some of the difficulties around getting to actually play.
The most common platforms people use to find D&D groups on the internet are actually well known - There’s no need for obscure websites or systems, roleplaying groups exist in all platforms. Some of the common ones are:
Discord
The most common messaging and voice chat app for gamers has, over the last decade, also evolved into its own social hub of sorts. While not quite reaching social network status, Discord has taken the place internet forums used to have, hosting thousands, if not millions of large communities under its umbrella these days. Its real-time text chat system makes it easy to share or exchange thoughts and experiences with others, and the relatively new thread system permits users to create semi-dedicated spaces to discuss specific subjects.
It is then no surprise Discord has become the go-to for gaming groups, including D&D ones. Indeed, there are dozens - if not hundreds - of communities dedicated to D&D among discord’s ecosystem. They range from small, home-game-like communities to sprawling servers with thousands of people sharing their love for the hobby. Finding a D&D game in Discord, then, isn’t impossible - if you’re willing to put up with some red tape.
Specifically, Discord communities tend to have differing rules, and the approach towards enforcing them, particularly when it comes to newcomers or new accounts, tends to be heavy-handed.It’s not uncommon to have to join and participate in a community before gaining access to specific activities, like D&D games. Moreover, since D&D is a game played by one dungeon master and usually four to six players, seats tend to go fast - the D&D community is known for a lack of DMs in favor of players, and nowhere is this better seen than in online communities trying to get games going. It’s not impossible to get a place on a game in a Discord community, but on the good ones it can take a long time.
Another common platform for gaming, Reddit is often thought of as the message board of the internet, with millions of sub-communities dedicated to niche hobbies and activities, and more popping up each day. Some Reddit communities are specifically dedicated to advertising groups to play D&D, generally using posts started by dungeon masters looking for players. DMs post the game they want to run, when, and the open seats, and people respond or contact the DM.
While this is an effective way of finding a game, the problems that tend to plague the hobby are more common here: It’s very hard, if not impossible, to vet the DM you’ll be playing with and the other players before joining. While Reddit communities have their own rules, usually the rules are regarding what can be posted there - so once you join a DM’s own private Discord, Zoom, or Meet server the community rules will no longer apply. While some DMs are great people, others aren’t too good at enforcing rules (or interested in it,) so finding a good game on Reddit can be quite difficult in general.
Possibly the hardest of common places to find a D&D table in, Facebook still does host many groups of people dedicated to the game, many of which help people connect with others to play.
The main issues Facebook presents, besides the fact that its rules only affect in-platform behavior, are curious ones. First, Facebook groups tend to appear and disappear, often out of the blue, due to Facebook’s heavy-handed, often overbearing approach towards content moderation. It’s not uncommon for Facebook groups to suddenly be closed for no apparent reason, with no way to appeal or even speak with anyone to try and understand what happened. This makes Facebook communities less stable than others.
A second common problem Facebook communities run into is one of spam. While Discord and Reddit allow for forum-like listings or separate channels to advertise yourself in, Facebook’s scroll-only approach to content means recruitment posts get lost quite fast, which often pushes people to post over and over and over and… you get it. Thus, it can be difficult to find a game you want, or can, play in when the platform offers you no way to filter among what’s being offered - and instead only shows you whatever’s most recent, or whatever it feels like.
The third problem Facebook has is, curiously, perhaps the worst one: Being a social network, when joining or posting in communities you’ll often be using your own identity. And while that can be a good thing, using your real name and Facebook profile means with every post you’re risking attracting the wrath of one of many bad apples among communities, and opening yourself to abuse or harassment. Because while Facebook has an overmoderation problem, in practice it seems to kick in only when not needed - often allowing for the worst of our internet denizens to thrive uncontested.
How a Dedicated Organized, Moderated Service Solves These Issues
Here is where platforms like StartPlaying.com come in. Not only newcomers to D&D know how difficult it can be to find a group to play with. Plenty of tabletop veterans have observed, and experienced, the inevitable droughts in gameplay that can mean waiting months, or years, to be able to play a game. But just as the internet can be used for horrible things, like allowing cesspools to thrive, it can also be used to build great things. So StartPlaying set out to build a space where all usual limitations to playing D&D are dealt with right away. It does this in three ways: First, StartPlaying has built a platform where you don’t need to spend ages trying to meet people who may want to play D&D. Instead, as you join, the groups are there - waiting for you!
Second, scheduling isn’t an issue. StartPlaying.games has groups available at any time, any day. When you browse games, the first thing you’re asked is when you can play, and then you’re shown groups that happen at that day and time. That way, it is impossible to find a group you like and then find out they can’t play at the same time as you.
Moreover, the average player on StartPlaying.games is committed to the table and campaign - after all, that’s why they join in the first place. The average StartPlaying game runs every week. For games on the platform pauses are the exception, not the rule.
Third, and this is what truly makes StartPlaying shine, the website prides itself on the safety of its dungeon masters and the inclusivity of all of its groups. Every Dungeon Master running games for Startplaying has to abide by a set of rules, banning most types of internet toxicity. Racism, sexism, homophobia, and anti-semitism all are banned for every single group, and Dungeon Masters and players who break this rule find themselves removed from the community. On top of that, most game masters have their own safety tools for their tables, be it lines & veils, x cards, debriefing, open door policies, that help you set what limits you need your games to have.
And as if that weren’t enough, StartPlaying’s listing system lets you read descriptions of both the games and the game masters you might be joining, allowing you to gauge whether any specific offering might suit you so you maximize the chances that any table you join might be the right table for you.
All in all, we all understand how difficult finding a group for D&D can be. And since there are millions of fans of the game all over the world, we also understand it should not be as difficult as it often is to get to playing. StartPlaying.games, then, is one of the better systems created specifically to deal with all the issues many players find, with the goal of removing all the red tape and getting anyone who wants to play as quickly, and as easily, as possible.
With this system at hand, the only remaining question is - are you ready to start playing?
About the author: Tizzy, Lover of cats, dragons, writing, and tabletop games. Every adventure is a new opportunity for insanity!
